Ok, that was just sentimental bullshit.
But I really do love to write. I don't know why. Maybe because I can make up a load of nonsense about some space warrior hero studmuffin who saves the world with a lazor gun and a switchblade, AND he can breath in space without any type of space suit or mask or whatever. And people would actually like it and call me a genius or something and not look at me like I was some sort of freak. Which would be a stretch, considering that idea was asinine.
You may be asking, "hey weres your actual stuff that you wrote you probably suck"
To which I would say, "fuck you, i'll show you my stuff when im goddamn ready you rude prick"
I'm ready now.
Let's start of with my beloved fanfic, Requiem of Eternity.
ROE is set within the universe of Dofus, a MMO created by Ankama(and one you will be hearing about quite a bit). It's something I started about two years ago, out of sheer boredom. It basically details the end of the Dofus period and the events that lead into the 1000 year lapse between Dofus and Ankama's upcoming clusterfuck/MMO, Wakfu.
The actual events that create said end have changed since my first foray. Originally, the story starred Kyrote Boulgarro, an Iop(warrior class of Dofus/Wakfu) with severe mental problems. The actually plot line was kind of stupid, and I can barely remember the jist of it, but there were some baddies of some sort who were tear shit up, and Kyrote was gonna stop them with his pals.
It was pretty shallow. I got good reviews though.
Well, everyone got good reviews back then.
But yea, eventually I realized how incredible horrible it was and went back to the drawing board, for about a year or two, give or take a day. What I came up with was vastly improved to the old version, but also easier to follow, no where near as bombastic as the first version.
If I delved into the characters and plots at this moment and time, I'd probably ruin the whole plot. I know its only a shitty little fanfic, but it's something I put a lot of time and thought into.
I'll just post an excerpt of it here, just to give you an idea of what I'm working with here.
"He felt no remorse. Not because he was devoid of feeling or rationality, but because he was merely doing his job. Just as a taxman felt no remorse for taking a destitute mother's last penny, just as a judge felt no remorse for sending a man to to his death, Dance felt no remorse for slitting his target's throat. It was merely a job.
Dance didn't know the man, but even if he did, it wouldn't have made much difference. He had no room in his heart or mind for exceptions. Whoever he was hired to kill would die without fail.
He released the flailing Enutrof the the floor, his life force quickly seeping from him. He tried to rise to his knees, but Dance forced him back to the ground with his boot. He held him there and watched him squirm. It reminded him of a larvae. Constantly writhing. Totally pathetic. The Enutrof had finally stopped moving.
Dance sheathed his dagger. He snuck out the way he came, though the Enutrof's back window. It was pitch black outside, a little more then half past midnight. The street was devoid of life, save for a small piwi that was up way past its bedtime. He walked up the street quickly and quietly as a cool breeze slowly swept past him. As he made it to the corner, he heard a high pitched scream. The missus stumbling upon the remains of her lifeless husband. A widow was born that night. Dance tugged on his hood as the chill of the wind intensified."
If you want to read more, here's a link
The story will definitely have its share of twists and turns, and by the end, you'll probably be shocked.
Or pissed off. Either is fine.
Next thing I'm going to torture you with is this little script I wrote for this game that never panned out.
You see, there was this german dude named Allain that was on the Cold Star forum, and he was all "lets make a game" I was like "cool I'll write somethin" and thats how it all got started, literally.
The basic premise of the story was some convoluted shit Allain had come up with that I had to struggle to fit into a working storyline because it was so staid and rpgish, rpgish meaning totally predictable.
Here's what he gave me, in his own words(no bullshit)
"hero=cool guy-> causes death of some and is killed himself-> ressurected-> order says he is chosen one-> mission to kill the old gods-> world reborn-> joins adventurer guild in order to cross borders undercover-> meets 3 more ppl with similar background (guilt+redemption) -> parallel:adventurer guild searches artifact -> last god_> he is stopped by one of the old ones that explains that he was used by the order-> fight against order-> how?-> artifact is wepon (^^) which was used by the humans in order to end the war with the old ones-> several quests for the old ones ind order to restore artifact-> kill order -> end"
What.
No seriously, what? And it's not like he was retarded in english, he had a great grasp of the language, but.
Dammit.
But that's what I had to work with, and so I got started on the saga of Hezlem Monarch, a cool guy who was also a thief and an all around badass. Because, honestly, why wouldn't your main character be a badass?
The story revolves around Hezlem going from robbing caravans to totally murdering Gods by the end of the story.
Well, that's how it would been, had the game actually been finished. I wasn't even halfway done when Allain left the forums and nevar returned.
Which was pretty fucking rude. I mean, I toiled over this storyline for him, and he just leaves?
Whatever, the game would have prolly sucked anyway.
But enough tough talk, heres an except:
Calwort: See anything yet?
(Hezlem shakes his head.)
Hezlem: Quiet today. Not a single carriage or merchant to come through.
Forthworth: And this is supposed to be a busy road! Load of shit if you ask me.
Hezlem: No one did, so quit whining and wait.
(Kev pulls a small knife out of his pocket and pokes the ground with it.)
Kev: How do you think it’ll be before we got caught?
Hezlem: What!? Don’t say tripe like that!
Forthworth: Yea, you’ll jinx us!
(Kev shrugs his shoulders)
Kev: It’s a foregone conclusion. All criminals get caught eventually.
Hezlem: But we are not common crooks! We are proper thieves.
Calwort: Proper as a queen.
Forthworth: Damn right!
Hezlem: Will you stop yelling you miserable lout?
(Forthworth gives Hezlem the finger)
Hezlem: Oh, clever.
Forthworth: Fuck off…
Calwort: Shh, I think I hear something.
(A merchant carriage draws near, flanked by two swordsmen. Hezlem and his men get ready to strike. When the carriage comes near the bushes, they jump out and stop the carriage)
Hezlem: Alright sweeties, give up the valuables and nobody loses their head.
(The merchant jumps out the carriage, bewildered)
Merchant: Oh no, bandits!
Swordsman 1:We’ll handle this! Nothing more then common scum.
(battle begins. I’m assuming this will be the tutorial battle of sorts, should be easy. For reference, Hezlem is a standard swordfighter, one handed blade, Kev uses daggers, Calwort uses alchemy, and Forthworth is a brute who fights with an axe)
(Merchant is frightened)
Merchant: P-p-please don’t hurt me! Take it all! Take it!
Hezlem: That is the plan….load up gentlemen, we don’t have time for sight seeing.
(Calwort, Kev, and Forthworth began to pick all the items that are in the merchant carriage: A good sum of gold, starter cash, some low level weaponry maybe, and a few potions or whatever you use to restore health)
Forthworth: This carriage is pretty spare, dontcha think?
Calwort: Money is money, no matter how meager the amount. Innit that right Kev-O?
Kev: I guess.
Hezlem: Alright gentlemen, lets be on our way, lest the old man soils himself…
Calwort: And I suppose you’ll be carrying your massive ego and nothing else?
Hezlem: That’s the plan.
Calwort: Lazy tosser….
(Hezlem shakes his head.)
Hezlem: Quiet today. Not a single carriage or merchant to come through.
Forthworth: And this is supposed to be a busy road! Load of shit if you ask me.
Hezlem: No one did, so quit whining and wait.
(Kev pulls a small knife out of his pocket and pokes the ground with it.)
Kev: How do you think it’ll be before we got caught?
Hezlem: What!? Don’t say tripe like that!
Forthworth: Yea, you’ll jinx us!
(Kev shrugs his shoulders)
Kev: It’s a foregone conclusion. All criminals get caught eventually.
Hezlem: But we are not common crooks! We are proper thieves.
Calwort: Proper as a queen.
Forthworth: Damn right!
Hezlem: Will you stop yelling you miserable lout?
(Forthworth gives Hezlem the finger)
Hezlem: Oh, clever.
Forthworth: Fuck off…
Calwort: Shh, I think I hear something.
(A merchant carriage draws near, flanked by two swordsmen. Hezlem and his men get ready to strike. When the carriage comes near the bushes, they jump out and stop the carriage)
Hezlem: Alright sweeties, give up the valuables and nobody loses their head.
(The merchant jumps out the carriage, bewildered)
Merchant: Oh no, bandits!
Swordsman 1:We’ll handle this! Nothing more then common scum.
(battle begins. I’m assuming this will be the tutorial battle of sorts, should be easy. For reference, Hezlem is a standard swordfighter, one handed blade, Kev uses daggers, Calwort uses alchemy, and Forthworth is a brute who fights with an axe)
(Merchant is frightened)
Merchant: P-p-please don’t hurt me! Take it all! Take it!
Hezlem: That is the plan….load up gentlemen, we don’t have time for sight seeing.
(Calwort, Kev, and Forthworth began to pick all the items that are in the merchant carriage: A good sum of gold, starter cash, some low level weaponry maybe, and a few potions or whatever you use to restore health)
Forthworth: This carriage is pretty spare, dontcha think?
Calwort: Money is money, no matter how meager the amount. Innit that right Kev-O?
Kev: I guess.
Hezlem: Alright gentlemen, lets be on our way, lest the old man soils himself…
Calwort: And I suppose you’ll be carrying your massive ego and nothing else?
Hezlem: That’s the plan.
Calwort: Lazy tosser….
For, some reason, I imagined them all being British. Don't ask, the answer would probably be something strange and unpleasant.
If you want to see the other portions I posted, a link is here.
Gah, this is a titan of a post, so I'm going to end it with something I've recently gotten back into, which has been entitled Midnight Theory, a story that is essentially a thinly veiled copy of DotHack with stoners. Videyas games are REAL.
I'll just post the first part of the story.
"Aya, your life is pathetic."
"Really?"
"Yay, really. You skip school like, every fucking day. You smoke pot like it's a part of your religion. And worst of all, you've got no future. What the point?"
Aya took a pull from her joint before laughing in Jason's face. She smiled.
"You think you know everything. You're just an old dude with a crappy restaurant. And a horrible haircut.".
They were sitting in front of Jason's diner, an old, creaking burger joint that had been there since the 60s. It was 12 after 12 in the afternoon, and the overcast sky bore an omen of heavy rain. Aya took another pull.
"You gotta get your shit together," Jason continued, ignoring everything she said. "Stay in school, that's the only way you can get a decent job nowadays."
Aya laughed again.
"Come on! You sound like my principal, and he is such a tool!"
"Dammit, I'm serious here! You can't just waste your life on weed. You're smart. You know better."
Aya sucked her teeth before rising to her feet.
"You're all preachy today. Blowing my high and shit...wait. If you don't want me to smoke weed, why do you sell it to me?"
Jason shrugged.
"Business is slow."
"You dick," said Aya as she walked away.
"Remember what I told you!" called Jason.
"Whatever..."
Aya's life had no structure. She had no authority figures in her life. She did as she pleased, and in her mind, no one had the right to tell her otherwise.
"Really?"
"Yay, really. You skip school like, every fucking day. You smoke pot like it's a part of your religion. And worst of all, you've got no future. What the point?"
Aya took a pull from her joint before laughing in Jason's face. She smiled.
"You think you know everything. You're just an old dude with a crappy restaurant. And a horrible haircut.".
They were sitting in front of Jason's diner, an old, creaking burger joint that had been there since the 60s. It was 12 after 12 in the afternoon, and the overcast sky bore an omen of heavy rain. Aya took another pull.
"You gotta get your shit together," Jason continued, ignoring everything she said. "Stay in school, that's the only way you can get a decent job nowadays."
Aya laughed again.
"Come on! You sound like my principal, and he is such a tool!"
"Dammit, I'm serious here! You can't just waste your life on weed. You're smart. You know better."
Aya sucked her teeth before rising to her feet.
"You're all preachy today. Blowing my high and shit...wait. If you don't want me to smoke weed, why do you sell it to me?"
Jason shrugged.
"Business is slow."
"You dick," said Aya as she walked away.
"Remember what I told you!" called Jason.
"Whatever..."
Aya's life had no structure. She had no authority figures in her life. She did as she pleased, and in her mind, no one had the right to tell her otherwise.
That's literally all I got on that, and I'm not gonna bother explaining anything yet, because I have no idea where this story is going to end up.
I'm done for now, do good in school and don't be pussies.
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